DEAR BOB,

I’m 14 and having trouble with the holiday blues this year. I like Christmas with the delicious treats and the presents. But you hear so much about being joyful. And there are so many needy people who are going hungry.

There are songs and messages about family and togetherness. And for my girlfriend, Christmas means that she goes from her mom’s to her dad’s and they always have an argument. Then there are so many kids who don’t even have a family to care about them. Their parents are on drugs, the kids have been abused, and maybe they are in foster care now. Then there’s my uncle who lost his brother years ago, and he’s sad when the holidays come around because he misses his bro. He tries to have fun with us, but you can tell this time of year is hard on him.

So many people are starving and suffering, and so many families aren’t happy and together. It’s like the holiday cheer is being thrown in their faces. With my friends and family, and others, having such a hard time because of this time of year, I don’t feel like I have any right to celebrate.

– Holiday Blues

DEAR BLUES,         

I commend you for being so perceptive and aware of how other people are feeling and doing. As well as how the holiday season affects them. Also, it’s great that you think for yourself instead of going along blindly with a message you may have read. It’s also great that you are learning about different experiences in the wider world.

But just because someone else is suffering, that doesn’t mean you have to have the holiday blues. You don’t have to suffer with them. If you have an attitude of gratitude and joy, maybe you can brighten their day, if they are open to your influence. Your smile and happy greeting to your uncle may be enough to help him have a better day. And if not, you can still share your blessings with others by contributing to things like food drives, or helping in a soup kitchen. Or even random acts of kindness! For example, you could send a greeting card to this man who has cancer and asked for Christmas cards for his dying wish.

Ultimately, you are responsible for your attitude and well-being. And other people are responsible for their own. As you grow into more of an adult you will hopefully learn that each person has the power in their own life. This is more true for adults than for kids. But kids still have power and choice and control over their own actions and attitudes. And each of us needs to focus on our own growth and attitude so that we can each live our best life and contribute to our communities in our own special ways.

Above all, don’t feel bad if you choose to shed your holiday blues.

Sincerely,

-Bob Cat

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